Nothing is harder for parents than seeing their child struggle and not knowing how to help. It’s important to remember that while there’s no single solution to stress, parents can do a lot to help teens recognize, reduce, and manage stress so it doesn’t get overwhelming. Here are four research-backed, time-tested stress strategies for teens.

1. Teach teens the difference between stress and anxiety.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, stress is “the physical or mental response to an external cause, such as having a lot of homework or having an illness.” Anxiety is the body’s internal reaction to stress, and it can happen even when there’s no current threat. In other words, stress goes away when the problem is resolved, but anxiety recurs, usually as a “persistent feeling of apprehension or dread that doesn’t go away.” When teens understand the difference between stress and anxiety, they can break down a big feeling of overwhelm into more manageable chunks. Since stress is external it often has an external solution, like getting help from a teacher, adjusting their schedule, or talking to a counselor. Taking concrete steps can help relieve internal anxiety by reducing the external causes of stress.

2. Teach teens to recognize how stress affects them.

Stress impacts teens physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially. Some common physical symptoms include headaches, stomachaches, and more frequent colds or other minor illnesses. Stressed teens may have trouble sleeping, feel more irritable or moody, struggle with learning and concentration, or isolate themselves socially. Negative self-talk and worry are also signs of stress. Parents can help teens understand the link between stress and symptoms like these and address the stress before it gets worse. If you notice a change in your teen’s health or behavior, simply asking, “Do you think this might have something to do with stress?” is a great way to start a conversation about the root cause.

3. Help teens build a strong network of relationships.

Social support equals better mental health for teens. Parents can’t do it all alone, and each trusted relationship in a teen’s life is a potential source of support when they’re dealing with stress. According to Search Institute, the most powerful relationships for teens to cultivate are developmental relationships with adults who express care, challenge teens to grow, provide support, share power and respect, and expand their possibilities. Teens might form developmental relationships with parents, teachers, mentors, coaches, or extended family members. And solid friendships with peers are important, too. One study found that adolescents who spent time with peers after a stressful event were less likely to feel sadness or worry than those who spent time alone.

4. Help teens build a toolkit of coping skills.

The teenage years expose kids to a whole new set of potential stressors, from academic pressures to more complex relationships. When parents help teens develop coping skills for everyday problems, they have a ready-made toolkit to deploy for life’s bigger stresses. You can make managing stress a family project and help your teen figure out what works best for them. A few ideas: see our picks for the best mindfulness and meditation apps for teens, or try these techniques for re-centering with nature. And don’t forget simple practices like keeping a gratitude journal; studies show that experiencing gratitude builds resilience and buffers against depression.

Stress is a part of life, but remember that it’s not always negative. Healthy stress, for example, can motivate teens to study hard for a test or practice until they master a new skill. Stress becomes dangerous when it becomes too much for teens to manage and affects their mental and physical health. These techniques empower teens to recognize, reduce, and manage their stress: a skill that will serve them well for the rest of their lives. 

This is the first proposal for using screening tools to detect children and adolescents who may have anxiety or depression. If implemented, the screening would be done along with regular physical checkups and trends toward anxiety would also be recorded as the child ages.

One of the tools researchers note that work well in reducing anxiety is more open communication between parents and children. There are simple ways to help your adolescent or teen reduce anxiety that simply involve listening, acknowledging feelings, and talking with your child.

By putting these tips in place on a regular basis your child will feel more inclined to share their feelings and their day-to-day anxieties.

1. Take time each day to encourage your teen or adolescent to tell you about their day. Use questions that can be answered beyond a yes or no. For instance, “What was something good that happened today?” or “What was your favorite part of the day today?”

You can also ask them if they had a difficult day or a sad time at school? Make sure you’re listening with empathy, and they understand they have time to talk freely. These conversations can happen each day without a rigorous schedule, in fact, if you integrate them easily into the day your child will feel more at ease with the conversation. Some parents find that asking these questions on the ride home from school are valuable, or while the child is doing daily chores or dishes or helping with dinnertime. During these conversations focus on hearing what the child is saying and not how you might fix it. Let them share freely, listen, and make sure they know you are there to support them.

2. Help underscore their coping skills and what they are doing to help themselves.

If your child is experiencing or expressing anxiety help them remember to use coping techniques, like deep breathing, or taking a walk to help lessen anxiousness (even on the playground). Talk to them about counting their breaths from 1 to 10, for a small break from the anxiety. Reassure your child or teen that anxiety is common and a normal part of life and using small interventions can help lessen the anxiety. Reflect back to your child the coping skills they are already using and underscore how powerful and kind those are to continue using.

3. Art, Sleep and Exercise

Encouraging your adolescent to explore their anxiety through art is also an optimal way to reduce their anxiety. Doing art with your child at home is also helpful as it can provide another time for ease in communicating about feelings. Music, dance, and exercise are all good methods for relieving anxiety. According to the American Art Therapy Association, artistic expression may decrease anxiety, feelings of anger and depression. This creative process can also enhance cognitive abilities, foster greater self-awareness, and help students regulate their emotions.

More Resources:

https://commons.emich.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1162&context=mcnair – Art Therapy as an as an Intervention and Its Effects on Anxiety and Depression

https://www.psychreg.org/attentive-listening-teens/ – Active Listening Helps Reduce Anxiety in Teens