Self-care can be physical, like getting enough sleep and moving your body, mental, like practicing gratitude and self-reflection, or emotional, like learning to self-regulate big feelings and strengthening relationships. Psychologists and behavior scientists say the best way to make self-care a habit is to start small: set a goal, find an action that supports it, and practice that action for just a few minutes each day until it becomes a part of your routine. The more practice teens have, the more easily they’ll be able to navigate transitions. Here’s how those healthy habits help:

1. Healthy habits keep teens on track. 

For millennia, explorers searched the skies for the guiding light of Polaris, the North Star, which identified true north. When they spotted the star, they knew if they were drifting off course. Teens in transition need a North Star, too – habits that remind them who they are when they’re at their best. A recent study from the University of Georgia found that teens with healthy habits like regular mealtimes, consistent bedtimes and after-school schedules reported greater self-control and emotional well-being, among other benefits. The study’s authors say that all teens experience dramatic neurological, biological and social changes during adolescence, and healthy habits provide a foundation of stability that makes it easier for them to deal with change.

2. Healthy habits reduce teens’ stress.

Stress is a major risk factor for mental health disorders like anxiety and depression, and teen stress levels are at an all-time high. According to psychologist Matt Bellace, transitions are especially tough for teens because “the teenage brain is generally more anxious than the adult brain… due to the rapid development of the amygdala, a brain structure involved in emotional expression, compared to the slower development of brain areas involved in decision making and reasoning.” Healthy habits like regular exercise, connection with others, and practices to develop emotional resilience are proven to build a buffer against stress. In the University of Georgia study, for example, researchers found that teens with consistent healthy routines had lower levels of the stress hormone epinephrine.

3. Healthy habits help teens reach their goals. 

Transitions are smoother when teens have a goal to work towards. When a challenge or change comes up, teens can ask, “Where do I want to go from here?” and set micro-goals to get closer to their big goal one step at a time. Healthy habits help teens identify the support they need and give it to themselves. A transition like making new friends can seem scary until teens break it down into simple steps like sitting in a new place at lunch, talking to one new person at school, or joining a club or activity that interests them. As those actions become habitual, teens take baby steps toward their goal until they attain it. Even better, they learn how to use the same process to achieve anything they set their minds to.

To help your teen navigate transitions and turn adolescence into an adventure, download Lucero. It’s a gamified wellness app that builds emotional regulation skills and self-care habits in just a few minutes a day. Lucero is the most fun and engaging way for teens to gain healthy habits with bite-sized content co-created by experts and tweens and teens themselves.

Why Emotional Regulation is Key

Emotional regulation is the ability to effectively manage emotions. It includes:

• Being able to self-reflect
• Feel emotions without being overwhelmed by them
• Dial down the intensity of negative feelings
• Cultivate positive feelings, and
• Feel in control of emotional experiences.

According to a brief from the Duke Center for Child and Family Policy, teens with good emotional regulation skills are better at:

• dealing with stress and frustration,
• persisting, problem-solving and delaying gratification to achieve goals,
• demonstrating compassion and concern for others in their decisions, and
• seeking help when they’re overwhelmed by stress or in a dangerous situation.

Research also suggests that emotional regulation protects teens’ long-term mental health. A 2019 study published in Brain Science found that emotional regulation skills mediate the effects of stressful life events and childhood adversity on teens’ risk for anxiety disorders and depression.

The bottom line? Emotional regulation helps teens build emotional resilience. But, because there are so many biological, neurological and social factors affecting teens’ emotions, it’s important to put a plan in place to help them gain tools. Here are three strategies to focus on:

1. Practice self-awareness.

The first step in regulating emotions is being able to “name and claim” them. Teens need to know it’s ok to feel their feelings – even the uncomfortable ones. Teach your teen that emotions are information. While emotions can help teens take care of themselves and make good decisions, they\’re not permanent or reflective of who they are as individuals. Self-awareness also means identifying what triggers negative emotions and nurtures positive ones, and taking responsibility for practicing emotional self-care.

1. Reframe negative thoughts and self-talk.

Emotions are closely linked to thoughts and self-talk; for example, a thought like “Everybody else thought that class was easy, but I didn’t understand anything. I’m so dumb,” can lead to feelings of shame, anxiety and fear. Reframing teaches teens to notice their negative, self-defeating thoughts and self-talk and switch to a more positive, self-compassionate and empowering perspective: “I’m sure I’m not the only person who’s struggling. I know I can get this. I’ll ask my teacher for help tomorrow.”

1. Future-focusing.

Future-focusing teaches teens to imagine future stressful scenarios, like bumping into an ex at school or taking a big test, and map out strategies to help themselves stay calm. They can walk through a challenging situation in their minds, decide what tools they will use and picture a successful outcome. Future-focusing can also mean planning a reward for completing a tough task, like taking 10 minutes of downtime for every hour of studying. Focusing on the future empowers teens to handle stressors proactively and positively.

And here’s a fun Spark tool from the Lucero app: 

Spark has over 600 self-care ideas for 30 different emotions! One of our favorites: When your teen is dealing with a tough emotion, ask “What would you say to someone else who felt _____?” How would you help them feel better?” This simple Q&A helps teens build a toolkit of proactive solutions, and sometimes it’s easier to handle a difficult emotion when we imagine it from a different perspective.