Why Being More Present is Key

Presence is another word for mindfulness: “the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us.” Being more present is a practice made up of small daily habits, like focusing on your breath, taking pauses throughout the day, and reflecting on your thoughts and feelings. Each of these habits helps train the brain to stay focused on what’s happening now, instead of getting lost in past or future worries. Among adults, mindfulness is proven to reduce symptoms of anxiety, depression, and stress-related medical conditions like high blood pressure.

Teens need the stress-busting, health-boosting benefits of presence, too. Adolescent stress levels now rival those of adults, and nearly one in three teens will experience an anxiety disorder. Teens also report more difficulty with focus and emotional regulation than other age groups. While the reasons for these struggles are complex and individual, researchers agree they’re due to a unique combination of external stresses – like academic and social pressures – and internal changes that take place as teens’ brains mature. One major factor is that the prefrontal cortex– the part of the brain that’s responsible for reasoning, attention and impulse control– isn’t fully developed until about age 25. \”It\’s not the fault of teenagers that they can\’t concentrate and are easily distracted. It\’s to do with the structure of their brains,” says Dr. Iroise Dumontheil of University College London\’s Institute of Cognitive Neuroscience.

All teens benefit from tools to build daily habits that help them stay calm, focused and grounded. Here are three simple ways you and your teen can practice being more present each day:

1. Focus on your breath.

Mindful breathing is proven to reduce anxiety, improve focus and regulate intense emotions. When your teen is worried, distracted or struggling with difficult emotions, teach them to take a few slow, deep breaths and pay attention to the physical sensations of breathing. This activates the calming effects of the parasympathetic nervous system and connects the mind and body in the present moment.

2. Reframe negative thoughts and self-talk.

Emotions are closely linked to thoughts and self-talk. A thought like “I’m so stupid; I didn’t understand anything in that class,” leads to feelings of shame, anxiety and fear. Reframing teaches teens to notice their negative thoughts and self-talk and switch to a more positive, self-compassionate and empowering perspective: “I’m sure I’m not the only person who’s struggling. I know I can get this. I’ll ask my teacher for help tomorrow.”

3. Use Spark!

Spark is one of our favorite features of the Lucero wellness app. It makes it easy and fun for teens to check in with themselves and learn simple strategies for being more present. They just tap the emotion they’re feeling, spin the wheel and get personalized ideas for self-awareness and self-care. Best of all, teens can use Spark alone or with their Crew (any friends and family who radically support each other) to make practicing presence a part of their daily routine.

1. Build a strong relationship with themselves.

Teens with high self-esteem have more positive relationships, and positive relationships lead to better self-esteem. Self-esteem often takes a hit during adolescence when physical, neurological, psychological and social changes combine with increased stress and responsibility. Healthy habits that boost teens’ connection with themselves include self-reflection, self-care, journaling, positive self-talk, and getting clear about personal values and goals. Encourage your teen to think about what it means to be their own best friend– how do you talk to someone you love and care about? What would you do if that person were having a hard time? Teens who love themselves have a built-in model of a supportive relationship, so they know they deserve a high level of care and respect from others.

2. Ramp up resilience.

Healthy habits help teens build a tool-kit of coping skills to deal with stress and regulate their emotions. Each tool increases their resilience, or the ability to bounce back from and overcome adversity. According to researcher and author Dr. Brené Brown, the five most common factors of resilient people include:

• They are resourceful and have skills to solve problems.
• They are more likely to seek help.
• They believe that they can do something to manage their feelings and cope.
• They have social support.
• They are connected with others.

3. Define their \”Framily.\”

According to the Urban Dictionary, a framily includes “friends or blood relatives to whom we would actually choose to be related, because the relationship is mutually respectful, close, supporting and affectionate.” Defining their framily helps teens reframe their support systems to include all the important relationships that don’t necessarily fit into traditional roles, like their mom’s best friend who’s more like an aunt, or a youth group leader or neighbor who always looks out for them. Take some time with your teen to map out your own framily members and highlight any relationships you want to strengthen. Let those people know that they’re a part of your teen’s tribe, then plan ways that you and your teen can deepen the most important connections.

4. Get serious about radical support.

At Lucero, we define framily as any combination of youth and adults who want to radically support each other. Who are the people your teen can rely on for radical support? Those are the relationships that belong in your teen’s inner circle. Radical support means different things to different people, but some key questions your teen can ask themselves include:

• Can I be my most authentic self around this person? Do they like and love me even when I’m feeling sad, silly, vulnerable, etc.?
• Can I trust this person? Do I know they will respect my boundaries and keep what I say confidential? Are they honest with me?
• Would I feel comfortable asking this person for help or support?
• How does this person handle conflict when it comes up? Can we get along even when we disagree?
• Is our relationship equally important to both of us?

To help your teen learn connection-boosting healthy habits like these, download Lucero. It’s a gamified wellness app that builds emotional regulation skills and self-care habits in just a few minutes a day. Lucero is the most fun and engaging way for teens to gain healthy habits with bite-sized content co-created by experts and tweens and teens themselves.

2019

The idea for Lucero was born in 2019 when three friends decided to combine their philanthropy, business and education technology expertise to address the youth mental health crisis. Founders Tom Murphy, Jim Hoover and Jeff Eastman envisioned a holistic, scalable solution that would bring mind-body-spirit well-being to the 1.2 billion adolescents around the world. The Personal Excellence Foundation was created to research the problem, identify potential solutions, and raise funds. Fun fact: the name Lucero was chosen because it means “light-bringer,” and to honor one of our founders’ former teachers!

2020 

From the very beginning, Lucero’s goal has been to make sure all the experts are involved, including mental health professionals, parents and other caregivers, and – most importantly – tweens and teens themselves. In early 2020, a pilot group of adolescents, parents, teachers and therapists at KIPP Austin College Prep Middle School and Samaritan Center helped develop our core curricula in the form of Quest Kits. The paper kits contained many of the self-care activities and self-reflection questions you’ll now find in the app.

2021

In 2021, over 200 Quest Kits were distributed to Boys & Girls Clubs throughout Austin to use for a 10-week period. The Boys & Girls Club pilot proved that tweens and teens who used the kit at least once per week showed an average of 20% growth in self-confidence and sense of purpose. We knew we were onto something, because multiple studies show that a sense of purpose is one of the most powerful protectors of mental health. That’s when we knew we needed to get Lucero in the hands of more tweens and teens.

2022

2022 was a big year for Lucero… we went digital! We started by asking tweens and teens, “If you had a magic app that could solve the problems you face, what would it do?” Then we built the safe space they asked for: an app that supports mental health by helping young people build healthy habits, gain tools for emotional resilience and connect with others who radically support them. We’re proud of the fact that all of Lucero’s content is co-created by trauma-informed therapists from Ensemble Therapy and Austin ISD who work hand-in-hand with our Youth Advisory Board. In fact, over 50+ youth, therapists, game designers and developers worked together to bring Lucero to life.

2023

So what’s next? 2023 will bring the launch of individual and family subscriptions and a pro dashboard for schools, community programs, and therapist networks. You can look forward to new features and more worlds to discover, all created with our uniquely youth-driven, gamified approach. We’re continuing our mission to become the go-to resource where tweens, teens and caregivers can find the skills, language and tools to navigate hard topics. We’re growing our community and supporting youth mental health with positive, proactive solutions that are fun, engaging, and take just a few minutes a day. So stay tuned and grow with us! The best is yet to come.

We don’t have a time machine on hand, but we have the next best thing for the young people in your life right now. Lucero is a gamified wellness app that helps tweens and teens build healthy habits for self-care and emotional resilience in just a few minutes a day. It’s designed by licensed therapists and tweens and teens themselves, and – best of all – it’s fun! Lucero gives young people a mental health mentor, right in their pockets. Here are four ways our approach is unique and tailored for today\’s tweens and teens:

1. Lucero is youth-driven.

It’s time to get serious about solving the youth mental health crisis. The number of high school students reporting persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness increased by 40% between 2009 and 2019, and from 2007-2018, suicide rates among youth ages 10-24 increased by 57%. To create solutions, we need all the experts on board, and Lucero believes that includes tweens and teens themselves. After all, who knows better how young people are thinking and feeling right now? We asked our youth advisors, “If you had a magic app that could solve the problems you face, what would it do?” Then we built the safe space they asked for. All of our content is created by trauma-informed licensed therapists who work closely with tweens and teens to get it right.

2. Lucero is accessible.

In 2016 only about half of children with a treatable mental health disorder actually received treatment, and the pandemic made it even harder for young people to access mental health care. Many face accessibility and affordability barriers, and most families lack the skills, language and tools to talk about mental health with confidence. Lucero makes emotional regulation and self-care skills accessible to anyone with a smartphone. It learns which activities improve teens’ mood and well-being, and provides a customized experience that includes families as part of the care team. Lucero also gives parents and pros insight into topics that resonate with teens, as well as streamlined access to support and resources.

3. Lucero is gamified.

Lucero’s approach is to gamify healthy habits like positive self-talk, emotional regulation and connection with others. The 12-week adventure of World 1 helps teens develop self-awareness and build confidence while evolving their Avatars, tracking their progress and earning badges. The Crew feature lets them invite up to seven friends and family members to join them on the journey, so they can have fun learning together. Why gamify? Studies show that making learning fun increases motivation, so tweens and teens stay engaged longer and lock in those healthy habits. 

4. Lucero is bite-sized.

Did you know that all it takes to create a healthy habit is just a few minutes a day? Behavior scientists and psychologists say the best way to make big changes is to take it one small step at a time. That means breaking down big goals into micro-habits: tiny habits that are easy to repeat and build over time. Teens who take this approach are more likely to stay inspired. Lucero provides daily reinforcement of resources and healthy habits that support teens in mind, body and spirit. It’s almost as if your older, wiser self showed up to say, “Hang in there! Here are some tools to help you get through this.” No time machine required.

1. Lead with empathy.

Sometimes teenage disappointments seem small from the perspective of a parent, and sometimes we see their mistakes coming from a mile away. But if parents dismiss or minimize teens’ feelings, they’re likely to internalize emotions instead of talking to you when things are hard. No matter what your teen is going through or how you feel about it, lead with empathy. If it’s hard not to say, “I told you so,” remind yourself that your teen doesn\’t have as much life experience as you do. Ask yourself how you would feel if you were their age and in their shoes, acknowledge their feelings, and express love and concern.

2. Hold space for their feelings. 

Disappointments often bring an incredibly complex mix of emotions. Let’s say your teen tries out for a team but doesn’t make the cut. Their disappointment may include shame about their performance, grief from losing hope for a goal they cared about, and fear about how not being on the team will affect their friendships with those who did make it. Your teen may not want or be able to articulate all those aspects, but you can still hold space for them to work through whatever they are feeling and let them know you understand that their disappointment has lots of layers.

3. Ask them what kind of support they need. 

Some teens need space to process their emotions while others want to talk it out. Some want downtime and others prefer to stay busy. Sometimes a parent’s perspective is welcome, and other times a warm hug without words might be best. Empower your teen by asking how you can best provide support. A simple, “What can I do that would make you feel most supported right now?” helps teens think about and speak up for their own needs: a powerful first step in healing their hurt feelings.

4. Affirm their worth and abilities.

Disappointments almost always involve some kind of perceived failure. They can cause teens’ self-esteem to take a hit and scramble their sense of identity: If that didn’t work out, what does it mean about who I am? It may seem obvious to you, but teens sometimes need reminders that their worth is not based on their achievements, popularity, or any external factor. Disappointments also provide an opportunity to tell them all the things you and others appreciate about them, strengthening your teen’s evolving identity. Your unconditional love provides a template for teens knowing how to love themselves even when things fall short of their expectations.

5. Give them a comprehensive coping toolkit. 

Disappointed teens can get drawn into spirals of negative thinking, and negative thoughts feed negative emotions. When they can’t break that cycle, they may be more vulnerable to depression, anxiety and self-criticism. Prepare your teen with tools like affirmations, self-compassion, and these stress strategies. Whenever they’re stuck in negativity, your teen can try techniques from mindful breathing to positive self-talk to practicing self-acceptance. This builds self-efficacy and lets teens know they are capable of self-care.

6. Help them use setbacks to fuel growth. 

It’s never fun to encounter disappointment, but hard things help us grow more than times when everything goes our way. Give your teen the gift of a growth mindset by sharing stories of your own setbacks and mistakes, what you learned, and how you moved forward. Praise them for persistence, effort, bravery and resilience. As Winston Churchill famously said, “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” Disappointments give teens an opportunity to get clear about their values and identity, refocus their energy, and aim for goals that make their lives meaningful.

There\’s no one-size-fits-all answer to this problem, but caregivers can help by teaching teens how to build healthy habits. Whatever the cause of their stress, tweens and teens who take just a few minutes each day to practice supportive habits feel more in control, reduce their anxiety, and boost executive functioning skills so they handle stress more effectively. Here’s how healthy habits help teens manage stress and anxiety:

1. They focus on solutions, not problems.

Just like adults, teens who are overwhelmed fixate on negative thoughts and imagine worst-case scenarios. But the teenage brain is still developing, so it processes information differently. The prefrontal cortex –the part of the brain responsible for reasoning, planning and logic– isn’t fully developed until about age 25. Until then, adolescents rely more on the emotion- and impulse-driven limbic brain to make decisions. That means they’re more likely to get trapped in a downward spiral of emotional upset. Healthy habits teach teens to focus on the solution to a problem rather than the problem itself. Instead of getting stuck in negativity, they learn to ask, “What can I do that will help me out of this situation?”

2. They gain a toolkit of positive practices.

Healthy habits can be viewed as foundational coping skills, regardless of age or stage of life. They help us stay strong –no matter what stress we’re facing– by supporting our mental, physical and emotional well-being. The teen years introduce more complex emotions, relationships and responsibilities, so the more positive practices teens learn, the better. And because the teenage brain is still developing, anchoring in healthy habits now makes them more likely to become lifelong. Habits to focus on include positive practices around sleep, diet, exercise, self-care, connection to others and more. Each gives teens a more complete set of tools so they feel in control and capable of handling any source of stress.

3. They provide structure.

A recent study from the University of Georgia found that teens with regular mealtimes, bedtimes and after school schedules “reported less alcohol use, greater self-control and emotional well-being and higher rates of college enrollment in young adulthood.” Consistent routines also correlated with lower levels of the stress hormone epinephrine. Healthy habits provide stability as teens experience the seismic neurological, psychological, social and emotional changes of adolescence. A foundation of well-being equips teens to learn, grow and handle change without succumbing to anxiety.

4. They build resilience. 

Resilience comes from the Latin resilio, meaning “to jump” or “to bounce back.” Stress is inevitable, but teens can practice bouncing back from challenges and find opportunities for growth. When teens experience upset, healthy habits provide a foundation to fall back on: When I feel overwhelmed by my emotions, I know I need to take a break to just breathe and check in with myself. “When we are resilient, we not only adapt ourselves to stress and disappointments, we also grow the insight to avoid actions that might lead us to face such situations,” says writer Maduleena Chowdhury. Resilience leads to self-awareness, and the more self-aware teens are, the more easily they adapt to stress.

To give your teen the benefit of stress-busting healthy habits, download Lucero. It’s a gamified wellness app that builds emotional regulation skills and self-care habits in just a few minutes a day. Lucero is the most fun and engaging way for teens to gain healthy habits with bite-sized content co-created by experts and tweens and teens themselves.

1. Practice positive thinking.

Confident people are almost always optimists, and optimism starts with positive thinking. Optimism is “a state of hopefulness and confidence about the future,” says Positivity Project founder Mike Erwin. “It\’s also a state we can train ourselves to adopt. We can resist pessimism, assert control, and learn to appreciate setbacks as what they really are–opportunities.” To help your teen think positively, make it a goal for the whole family to look at the bright side. That doesn’t mean ignoring problems; instead, it’s about keeping the focus on what you can control instead of what you can’t and proactively seeking solutions. Empower your teen to think creatively, solve problems and find opportunities, and their confidence will increase exponentially.

2. Get out of your comfort zone.

Confidence doesn’t mean you never feel fear, but it does mean you’re less likely to let fear hold you back. “Those who invite discomfort are able to achieve more, take more significant risks and break through barriers, and are open to facing new challenges,” says Angeli Gianchandani, founder of Mobility Girl, a platform designed to empower young people through mentorship. “Discomfort is a form of self-growth, pushing yourself mentally to overcome fear.” To help your teen lean into growth opportunities, encourage them to take risks to pursue their goals and find the lessons in mistakes and set-backs. Each time they get out of their comfort zone, they’re expanding their capacity for confidence.

3. Embrace self-care. 

Truly confident people practice self-compassion and self-care to stay strong. “Recent research has shown self-compassion was associated with self-worth,” says Michele Patterson Ford, Ph.D., a psychologist and senior lecturer in psychology at Dickinson College. “Knowing your value is an important component of feeling confident in oneself.” Self-care habits start with self-awareness, so teach your teen to check in with themselves mentally, physically and emotionally. When they know what they need, they can take steps to provide it for themselves or ask others for help. Self-care includes everything from exercising to getting enough sleep to making time to do the things you love to do. Whatever it means for your teen, make sure they know they’re worth it and support them when they take time to nurture themselves.

4. Connect with others.

Positive psychology pioneer and University of Michigan professor Christopher Peterson was famous for saying, \”I can sum up positive psychology in just three words: Other people matter.\” Numerous studies show a powerful reciprocal relationship between feeling connected to others and feeling good about ourselves. To help your teen gain confidence through connection, make sure they prioritize IRL time with friends and family. Encourage them to express gratitude and give them tools to resolve conflict. You can also make connections together by volunteering in the community. “One of the most practical ways to be more hopeful about the future is to realize that you can and do make a difference in people\’s lives,” says writer Bill Murphy, Jr. “By focusing on helping others, we gain the added benefit of increasing our own levels of happiness and optimism.”

To help your teen learn confidence-boosting healthy habits like these, download Lucero. It’s a gamified wellness app that builds emotional regulation skills and self-care habits in just a few minutes a day. Lucero is the most fun and engaging way for tweens and teens to gain healthy habits with bite-sized content co-created by experts and teens themselves.

A habit is automatic, something we don’t have to think about. But habit formation isn’t just about taking the easy way out; it\’s actually a  brilliant neurocognitive strategy that helps our brains manage the vast amounts of information we process every day. Habits free up energy to learn, solve problems and handle daily tasks without overloading our brains.

Understanding the science of building healthy habits is especially important for parents and caregivers of tweens and teens. Habits can either help young people stay healthy or they can stand in the way. “Habits play an important role in our health,” says Dr. Nora Volkow, director of NIH’s National Institute on Drug Abuse. “Understanding the biology of how we develop routines that may be harmful to us, and how to break those routines and embrace new ones, could help us change our lifestyles and adopt healthier behaviors.” Here are four facts you need to know to help your teen build healthy habits:

1. Tiny increments lead to big change. 

In the book Atomic Habits, author James Clear writes, “Too often, we convince ourselves that massive success requires massive action. Improving by 1 percent isn’t particularly notable… but it can be far more meaningful, especially in the long run.” Clear points out that a 1% improvement each day for a year means you’re 37x better by the end of it. And while dramatic actions can be motivating at first, they disrupt our routines and are difficult to maintain. To make healthy habits stick, teens need to know that small, consistent efforts lead to long-term improvement.

2. Habits add up over time. 

“The effects of your habits multiply as you repeat them,” says Clear. We may not notice the effects of our daily habits as we’re going through our normal routine. But think about a habit’s cumulative impact over time: spending 5 minutes a day for one year meditating, connecting with others or exercising versus the same 5 minutes doom-scrolling on social media. The big picture can be overwhelming, but we can teach teens that success is about pointing themselves in the direction of their goals and taking small steps until they arrive.

3. It should be easy and feel good to practice self-care.

Stanford researcher and behavior scientist BJ Fogg says that a big part of why we don’t embrace healthy habits is that we think change has to be hard. But in his own experiments, Fogg found that simple, fun changes (like doing two push-ups every time he went to the bathroom) were easy to maintain and made him feel good. That led to more positive habits: “As I accumulated dozens of new habits – mostly tiny ones – they combined to create a transformation. Sustaining all this did not feel hard.” Parents and caregivers can set a precedent for making healthy habits easy by doing self-care together with teens and focusing on goals that are both meaningful and fun.

4. Lucero makes daily healthy habits easy for teens.

Lucero is a youth-driven, therapist-approved gamified wellness app for tweens, teens and their Crew (yes, that means you!) It’s designed to make daily healthy habits simple and fun, because science shows that’s the best way to support teens’ mental health and overall well-being. Lucero features 84+ gamified micro-lessons on topics like self-confidence, 600+ customized self-care activities, and ways for teens to track their progress and stay connected to people who radically support them. It’s a fun and engaging wellness app for practicing emotional regulation and – best of all – it takes just a few minutes a day to spark a lifetime of healthy habits!

You could say that to be confident is to trust yourself. Confidence gives teens faith in their own abilities and a secure sense of self-reliance. It’s the cornerstone quality that helps them navigate the changes of adolescence, make good choices and thrive in a rapidly-changing world.

Why Confidence is Key

Teens who lack confidence miss out on critical growth opportunities because they are less likely to take risks, join in activities and speak up for themselves. They may expect to fail or become overly perfectionistic. They’re also more susceptible to depression, anxiety, substance-use, self-harm and being negatively influenced by peers.

High levels of confidence, in contrast, are proven to protect teens’ mental health. Confident teens are more emotionally resilient, optimistic, persistent and self-compassionate. They have more social support and lower levels of common mental health problems like depression and anxiety. And confident teens are more likely to get the most out of opportunities for growth and self-discovery, like challenging classes and team sports. In short, teens who lack confidence struggle, and teens who have confidence thrive.

The Perfect Storm

Adolescence challenges kids’ confidence in multiple, intersecting ways. In the span of a few years, teens undergo seismic shifts in their bodies, brain chemistry, and emotional and social landscapes. In the midst of all that change, they are tasked with crafting their identities and taking on new levels of independence and responsibility. And because they\’re neurologically wired to seek belonging with peers, the opinions of others suddenly matter much more.

These rapid-fire changes test even the most well-adjusted teens. In a study of 1,300 tween and teen girls, authors Claire Shipman, Katty Kay, and JillEllyn Riley discovered that, between the ages of 8 and 14, confidence levels dropped by 30%. “The change can be baffling to many parents,” they write in The Atlantic. “Their young girls are masters of the universe, full of gutsy fire. But as puberty sets in, their confidence nose-dives, and those same daughters can transform into unrecognizably timid, cautious, risk-averse versions of their former self.”

Why You Need a Proactive Plan

Because of the multiple factors that can damage teens’ confidence, it\’s not enough to leave it up to chance. Teens need a proactive plan to gain tools, strategies and habits that build their confidence and keep it high. Here are three things parents can do to put a solid plan in place:

1. Keep communicating.

Confident teens know their parents and caregivers are on their team, and they feel comfortable communicating about what matters most to them and any challenges they’re going through. It’s natural, though, for teens to become more guarded and private during adolescence. To keep the lines of communication open, stay curious about your teen’s interests. That’s where they feel most confident and, when they know you care about what’s important to them, they’ll see you as an ally in other areas, too.

1. Support them in getting out of their comfort zone.

Taking on a challenge can be scary at any age, but it’s one of the best ways to build confidence. Author Alex Malley says, “Take a risk and take action despite your fear of failure, messing up or embarrassment. If things work out, then you now know you can do more than you think. If things don’t work out, you now know that you can handle more than you think. Either way, you’re better off.” Help your teen explore the world around them and get comfortable taking positive risks. When you know they really want to try something new, be their cheerleader.

1. Build healthy habits.

Teens need daily practice to keep their confidence high. Healthy habits like positive self-talk, mindfulness and self-care are essential tools to protect teens’ confidence and boost their self-awareness. Our gamified wellness app, Lucero, was designed with teen confidence in mind; in fact, it’s a key topic in World 1. It’s a fun, no-pressure way for teens to get daily inspiration and encouragement and build healthy habits.