self-reflection – Lucero Speaks

Why is Nurturing Self-Discovery so Important Right Now?

mbutler — Thu, 10 Aug 2023 23:00:11 +0000

If you’ve been following us for a while, you probably already know that everything Lucero creates – from new features in the app to our social posts – is a collaboration between licensed clinical therapists and a team of youth advisors. Hands down, we believe that the best way to address the current youth mental health crisis is by building solutions with the input of tweens and teens themselves.

You also probably know that we’re big on self-discovery. That’s because developmental psychologists say that establishing a unique, individual identity is what adolescence is all about. Research shows that a strong sense of self benefits tweens and teens by:

increasing self-awareness and self-confidence
building self-regulation skills
guiding them to make healthier choices
protecting their mental health, and
helping them grow into resilient adults.

Emphasizing self-discovery during adolescence should be a given, right? But here’s what we’ve learned from talking with tweens and teens: When asked to define self-discovery, they either don’t have an answer or they equate it with determining sexuality and gender identity. While that is certainly an important part of self-discovery, there is so much more that makes you… well, YOU! We need to do a better job of teaching young people how to explore their unique skills, values, and strengths, and how to use those qualities to build a happy, healthy life. That’s where Lucero comes in.

Lucero’s Journey feature gamifies the inner work of self-discovery to make it fun and engaging. Based on personality traits, users create an Avatar who grows and transforms with them. They advance on their voyage by answering questions crafted to build self-awareness and provide individualized emotional regulation skills. Prompts might, for example, help them discover healthy habits to deal with stress or other difficult emotions. New insights and tools are added to each user’s personal Log for easy, anytime access.

Here are three ways Lucero’s playful, bite-sized approach to self-discovery supports the development of a strong sense of self:

1. Tweens and teens learn to look inside for answers.

Adolescents are growing up in a world of constant comparison and pressure to look to others for answers. Whether scrolling on Instagram, TikTok, and Snapchat or going down YouTube rabbit holes, they’re bombarded with external opinions and judgments. One therapist who advises Lucero says, “When asked questions, they often route it to what other people say, think or do. It is very challenging to turn that question around for youth to really reflect on their own opinions about various topics.” Lucero encourages users to explore their own values, quirks, and strengths, and boosts their confidence to just be themselves.

2. Lucero models the importance of self-care.

Self-discovery isn’t just about learning what makes you special; it’s also about learning how to take good care of yourself. Each of Lucero’s features is designed to give tweens and teens practical, developmentally-appropriate tools and practices to care for their minds, bodies, and hearts. Users learn how to identify, name and regulate their emotions, develop healthy habits that are proven to protect mental health, and reach out for support from others. Strengthening emotional regulation skills teaches them that they can control their emotional state, which builds self-efficacy.

3. Lucero embeds the journey of self-discovery in the support of real-life relationships.

One critical piece of a youth’s self-discovery journey is finding a sense of belonging with others. Researchers tell us that acceptance, inclusion, and feeling valued by others helps strengthen an adolescent’s identity and self-confidence. That’s why Lucero makes real-life relationships part of the self-discovery equation. Tweens and teens can invite any combination of friends and family members to join their Crew. Crew members share insights, offer support, and help each other reach their goals. By strengthening tweens’ and teens’ relationship with themselves and with others, Lucero helps them discover and grow into the healthiest, happiest version of themselves.

How Healthy Habits Help Teens Navigate Transitions

Jillian — Thu, 02 Mar 2023 04:39:36 +0000

Imagine that you’re an explorer about to journey into unfamiliar territory. You have no idea what challenges you’ll face, so you need to fill your pack with tools to help you stay safe and find your way. Adolescence is a lot like that: exciting, scary, and full of transitions. And just like explorers, teens need tools to help them navigate. Caregivers can equip teens for the journey with healthy habits: daily self-care practices that support them in staying strong and steering through big changes with confidence.

Self-care can be physical, like getting enough sleep and moving your body, mental, like practicing gratitude and self-reflection, or emotional, like learning to self-regulate big feelings and strengthening relationships. Psychologists and behavior scientists say the best way to make self-care a habit is to start small: set a goal, find an action that supports it, and practice that action for just a few minutes each day until it becomes a part of your routine. The more practice teens have, the more easily they’ll be able to navigate transitions. Here’s how those healthy habits help:

1. Healthy habits keep teens on track.

For millennia, explorers searched the skies for the guiding light of Polaris, the North Star, which identified true north. When they spotted the star, they knew if they were drifting off course. Teens in transition need a North Star, too – habits that remind them who they are when they’re at their best. A recent study from the University of Georgia found that teens with healthy habits like regular mealtimes, consistent bedtimes and after-school schedules reported greater self-control and emotional well-being, among other benefits. The study’s authors say that all teens experience dramatic neurological, biological and social changes during adolescence, and healthy habits provide a foundation of stability that makes it easier for them to deal with change.

2. Healthy habits reduce teens’ stress.

Stress is a major risk factor for mental health disorders like anxiety and depression, and teen stress levels are at an all-time high. According to psychologist Matt Bellace, transitions are especially tough for teens because “the teenage brain is generally more anxious than the adult brain… due to the rapid development of the amygdala, a brain structure involved in emotional expression, compared to the slower development of brain areas involved in decision making and reasoning.” Healthy habits like regular exercise, connection with others, and practices to develop emotional resilience are proven to build a buffer against stress. In the University of Georgia study, for example, researchers found that teens with consistent healthy routines had lower levels of the stress hormone epinephrine.

3. Healthy habits help teens reach their goals.

Transitions are smoother when teens have a goal to work towards. When a challenge or change comes up, teens can ask, “Where do I want to go from here?” and set micro-goals to get closer to their big goal one step at a time. Healthy habits help teens identify the support they need and give it to themselves. A transition like making new friends can seem scary until teens break it down into simple steps like sitting in a new place at lunch, talking to one new person at school, or joining a club or activity that interests them. As those actions become habitual, teens take baby steps toward their goal until they attain it. Even better, they learn how to use the same process to achieve anything they set their minds to.

To help your teen navigate transitions and turn adolescence into an adventure, download Lucero. It’s a gamified wellness app that builds emotional regulation skills and self-care habits in just a few minutes a day. Lucero is the most fun and engaging way for teens to gain healthy habits with bite-sized content co-created by experts and tweens and teens themselves.

Why Emotional Regulation is so Important for Teens

Jillian — Tue, 24 Jan 2023 18:06:22 +0000

The teen years are known for intense emotions with good reason. First, the prefrontal cortex – the part of the brain in charge of reasoning, logic and impulse control – is still developing in teens. Second, the hormones that spark puberty’s physical changes also amp up activity in the emotional and reward-seeking centers of the brain. Finally, teens are navigating more complex relationships with peers and are more highly attuned to what others think of them. All of these factors mean that teens’ feelings really are bigger and do fluctuate more frequently. That’s why emotional regulation skills are critical in any teen’s self-care toolkit.

Why Emotional Regulation is Key

Emotional regulation is the ability to effectively manage emotions. It includes:

Being able to self-reflect
Feel emotions without being overwhelmed by them
Dial down the intensity of negative feelings
Cultivate positive feelings, and
Feel in control of emotional experiences.

According to a brief from the Duke Center for Child and Family Policy, teens with good emotional regulation skills are better at:

dealing with stress and frustration,
persisting, problem-solving and delaying gratification to achieve goals,
demonstrating compassion and concern for others in their decisions, and
seeking help when they’re overwhelmed by stress or in a dangerous situation.

Research also suggests that emotional regulation protects teens’ long-term mental health. A 2019 study published in Brain Science found that emotional regulation skills mediate the effects of stressful life events and childhood adversity on teens’ risk for anxiety disorders and depression.

The bottom line? Emotional regulation helps teens build emotional resilience. But, because there are so many biological, neurological and social factors affecting teens’ emotions, it’s important to put a plan in place to help them gain tools. Here are three strategies to focus on:

Practice self-awareness.

The first step in regulating emotions is being able to “name and claim” them. Teens need to know it’s ok to feel their feelings – even the uncomfortable ones. Teach your teen that emotions are information. While emotions can help teens take care of themselves and make good decisions, they\’re not permanent or reflective of who they are as individuals. Self-awareness also means identifying what triggers negative emotions and nurtures positive ones, and taking responsibility for practicing emotional self-care.

Reframe negative thoughts and self-talk.

Emotions are closely linked to thoughts and self-talk; for example, a thought like “Everybody else thought that class was easy, but I didn’t understand anything. I’m so dumb,” can lead to feelings of shame, anxiety and fear. Reframing teaches teens to notice their negative, self-defeating thoughts and self-talk and switch to a more positive, self-compassionate and empowering perspective: “I’m sure I’m not the only person who’s struggling. I know I can get this. I’ll ask my teacher for help tomorrow.”

Future-focusing.

Future-focusing teaches teens to imagine future stressful scenarios, like bumping into an ex at school or taking a big test, and map out strategies to help themselves stay calm. They can walk through a challenging situation in their minds, decide what tools they will use and picture a successful outcome. Future-focusing can also mean planning a reward for completing a tough task, like taking 10 minutes of downtime for every hour of studying. Focusing on the future empowers teens to handle stressors proactively and positively.

And here’s a fun Spark tool from the Lucero app:

Spark has over 600 self-care ideas for 30 different emotions! One of our favorites: When your teen is dealing with a tough emotion, ask “What would you say to someone else who felt _____?” How would you help them feel better?” This simple Q&A helps teens build a toolkit of proactive solutions, and sometimes it’s easier to handle a difficult emotion when we imagine it from a different perspective.

Turning Negative Self-Talk into Confidence

Jillian — Sun, 17 Jul 2022 18:48:42 +0000

“I can’t believe I missed that goal. I suck at hockey.”

“I’m so fat. Nobody will ever like me.”

“I’m going to bomb my algebra test… and probably the whole semester.”

If you\’re the parent of a teenager, chances are, you hear more than your fair share of negative self-talk. All teens (and let’s face it: adults, too!) are moody, cranky, and self-critical sometimes. But while some negative self-talk is normal, studies show that if taken too far, it leads to higher levels of stress, depression, and anxiety in adolescents. It also affects their academic performance, social well-being, and long-term self-esteem.

Since negative self-talk can be a sign of more serious depression or anxiety, parents should pay attention. But for most teens, know that negative self-talk is a habit that can be changed. Parents can teach teens to become more aware of their self-talk and transform self-criticism into self-confidence. Here are our favorite tips for turning teens’ negative self-talk around:

Notice. Don’t judge. As they go about their daily lives, teens can learn to pay attention to how their inner voice interprets their experiences. The key is to just observe at first, without judging themselves or their thoughts. According to psychologist Mary Alvord, “the idea is not to squelch the negative thought. Research has found that attempted ‘thought stopping’ can actually make the idea stickier. Rather, you want your child to face the thought, thoroughly examine it and replace it with a more realistic and helpful perspective.”

Examine negative self-talk. Taking some time to self-reflect gives teens valuable information about what’s going on in their minds and emotions. Sometimes negative self-talk reveals an actual problem. Maybe they’re dealing with test anxiety, feeling insecure about a friendship, or struggling with a transition. If you hear your teen repeat the same self-talk several times, mention it: “I noticed you’ve been really hard on yourself lately when you’re talking about try-outs. Want to talk about it?” When teens understand the feelings underneath their self-talk, they are empowered to be proactive and find a real-world solution, like asking someone they trust for support.

Reframe negative self-talk. Once they understand where their negative self-talk is coming from, teens can use the following steps to reframe it:

Evaluate the evidence. Ask: What are the actual facts? What evidence do I have that my negative thought is true? Is there evidence that it is untrue? How does the evidence stack up?
Seek alternate explanations and perspectives. Ask: Is there another explanation for this situation? Would someone else look at this situation in a different way? Is there another way I could look at this situation?
Practice self-compassion: Ask: What would I say to a good friend in this situation? What would a good friend say to me? How would I think about this situation if I had my own best interests at heart?
Create an affirmation: Flip the negative self-talk into a positive affirmation by stating the opposite. “This is too hard for me” becomes “ I like challenges,” and “I really screwed up” becomes “I choose to learn from my mistakes and not let them limit me.” When teens are trapped in negativity, affirmations help them reprogram their thinking with a positive outlook.

Visualize their ideal outcome. When they’re focused on everything that could go wrong, ask your teen to imagine the best thing that could happen instead. Teach them to picture their ideal outcome and then feel the good feelings that wash over them. The combination of positive mental imagery and emotional engagement builds self-confidence and edges out negative thinking.

Practice goal-oriented thinking. Self-talk can help teens reach their goals or it can hold them back. Goal-oriented thinking means listening to self-talk and asking, “Is this way of thinking helping me achieve my goals?” If not, teens can reframe it to aim in the direction they want to go in. Having a big goal is motivating, and upgrading their self-talk is one of the steps teens can take to get closer to achieving it.

Turning negative self-talk around helps teens feel more confident, motivated, and optimistic. It helps them handle everyday stress in a more constructive way and supports mental and emotional well-being. By practicing these steps, teens learn that they have the power to shape their reality from the inside out, one positive thought at a time.

Helping Your Teen Embrace the Art of Conscious Living

Jillian — Thu, 19 May 2022 18:32:41 +0000

“At its simplest, conscious living is the art of feeling your feelings, speaking authentically, knowing your life purpose, and carrying out effective actions that contribute to your well-being and the well-being of others. The moment we commit ourselves to living consciously, we embark on a journey of wonder through the real world.” – Gay Hendricks, Conscious Living: Finding Joy in the Real World

Conscious living is a lifelong practice, but teens have an edge in developing the skills to live in a more satisfying, self-aware way. During early adolescence the brain undergoes explosive growth in metacognition, or awareness of and ability to understand one’s own thought processes. Sometimes called “thinking about your thinking,” metacognition helps teens self-reflect, evaluate their own thoughts, feelings, and behavior, and make more thoughtful choices. The teen years are also when long-term habits develop. It\’s the perfect time for parents to provide teens with tools and techniques to grow into living consciously.

7 Strategies To Help Teens Embrace Conscious Living

Model metacognitive thinking Parents are their kids’ best role models when it comes to making conscious choices. The opposite of conscious living is going through life on autopilot, reacting instead of reflecting and responding to challenges. To boost your own self-awareness, cut down on mindless multitasking and find ways to practice mindfulness, even if it’s just a few moments of meditation each day. Let your kids observe you thinking through your own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors and taking action to change things that don’t serve you. When you put your own conscious-living practices in place, teens will take note.
Invite self-reflection When your teen talks to you about decisions or challenges, they’re facing, be genuinely curious. Avoid the temptation to leap to conclusions or give them advice. Ask open-ended questions and encourage them to explore their own thoughts and actions out loud. Thoughtful questions (instead of suggestions) help teens develop their metacognitive superpowers. Try asking “What do you think would happen if you tried ___?” or “What do you think your teacher meant by ___?”
Identify unhelpful habits Most of us, including teens, have a few unconscious habits that keep us from focusing on the things that are most important in life. Letting go of unhelpful habits is empowering for teens, but they have to be intrinsically motivated to do so. Parents can help by noticing when de-energizing habits (like staying up too late) are impacting activities that are important to teens (like getting to practice on time). Help teens see that they’re making a choice between values, and they’re ultimately the ones who decide where to put their energy.
Prioritize inner awareness For all of us, worrying too much about what other people think can get in the way of conscious living. Teens tend to be especially susceptible to worrying about the opinions of others and may ignore their own inner awareness if they think others will judge or exclude them. Living consciously means being brave, trusting our intuition, and making decisions based on our personal values. Parents can help steer kids back towards trusting themselves and letting go of the fear of being different.
Remind teens what they are in charge of A big part of conscious living is taking responsibility for the things we can control and letting go of the things we can’t. A powerful reminder: we are in charge of our own words, values, choices, mistakes, efforts, and behavior. We can’t control the words, values, choices, mistakes, efforts, or behavior of others. When teens are dealing with difficulty, help them find a response from the things they can control, instead of feeling frustrated by the things they can’t.
Encourage emotional intelligence Teens often experience surges of new, intense emotions. When they aren’t sure how to process these feelings, they can get overwhelmed, feel anxious, and either zone out or act out. Conscious living means accepting all emotions as valid and listening to and learning from them. Parents can help by normalizing talking about feelings and giving kids tools to process intense emotions, like mindful breathing, journaling, or talking things through with a mentor.
Spotlight how choices lead to change At its heart, conscious living is all about making choices – choices about what we value, where we put our time and attention, and how we want to live. Living consciously helps teens take empowered action towards ever-greater alignment with their values, vision, and goals. Parents can remind teens that whatever the circumstances, they can always choose how to respond, and any situation can be changed through reflection and action. Even through seemingly small acts, teens can craft the life they want to live, one conscious choice at a time.